New Year 2015

I thought that 2014 would be a great Year for me.

But it wasn’t. It brought great loneliness, Desire, hatred and self-loathing!

Why don’t I have enough money to travel?

Why are we having Debts now?

Is it my fault?

Why is there still no Ties in my family?

Why can’t I connect with my brother?

Why am I still afraid of my father?

Why am I so useless?

Why am I so stupid?

All this thoughts kept bugging me all day, each day, everyday.

It’s scary. I’m scared!

That if I can’t resolve this feeling, I may lose myself.

I may become crazy

That is why , in what little sanity I have, I cling to it.

I grasp it, standing between the Border of insanity and sanity.

Which is it? [Doche?]

I want to Change.

I want to become Stronger.

Stronger

Courageous

I want to express my emotions more.

That is why, the Days I have live. The days I have survived upto now.

I want to treasure them.

I want to make it better.

But I’m scared.

It’s scary

Someone Help me!